Immediately when I read this question “active listening” came to mind. Without a doubt Trenholm, I am sure, could have gone on for pages about this topic alone. The only reason she did not is because she had to cover a much broader view of communication.
The reason I feel that this topic would take up an entire book to adequately cover is because I feel it is the most important aspect of communication. This is why some people have all the friends they do, and why some have no friends at all. People do not listen. I do not think that it is because everyone loves to talk so much. It is because they do not know how to listen, and instead they resort to talking. In this unfortunate mix relationships end before they are ever started. There is so much that we can learn about each other if we just ask, then ask some more.
My advice is this: bring up Youtube and put on a clip from any David Letterman interview. Look at the nonverbal behavior of the star as they enter the talk show. Then notice how the celebrity loves talking about themselves. Just as that celebrity loves the attention, our friends and family love that attention as well! Give it to them some time, and make them feel special, because they are.
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